October 2010
7 posts
“The New Optimism
by Dean Young
The recital of the new optimism
was oft...”
– (via princesspanties)
Skylands for Minecraft! →
If you play minecraft, don’t miss this. It is truly freaking awesome.
“Its the new kind of phone. Its only silent to dogs.”
– Neil
June 2010
1 post
January 2010
7 posts
One good polar bear story... (thanks JB) - helen's... →
I LOVE POLAR BEARS!
La Nouveaux Tie →
How to tie this tie…tie.
USB Drive Bottle Opener | Uncrate →
Created by TrekStor, who obviously understand the relationship between data and drinking, the USB Stick CO with Bottle Opener ($12-$80) is a great-looking USB 2.0 thumb drive made from solid brushed aluminum and featuring a bottle opener on one end. Available in capacities ranging from 1-8GB, you should be able to find one to suit your needs.
How to tie a Hakama. →
September 2009
1 post
Seussical the Musical
has been taking up all of my time. We had opening night friday the 25th. It kicks ass totally. I am definitely Horton. At any rate, that rehearsal schedule accounts for the lack of posts these last few whiles. I’ll get back on that at first oppurtunity, eg when the show closes. G’night internet d>_<b
August 2009
8 posts
Sarah Palin Never Gets Old →
This is a quote generatory for Sarah Palin. The quotes are fictional. They still have a very realistic sarah palin-ish quality about them, I’d say.
I have a new game
Here’s what you do. If you ever hang out with people with a laptop out, which I’m sure many of you do, listen for someone making a statement to the air. The kind of statement that’s not really meant for anyone, but just because it needed to be said in their mind. Google that statement. You’ll find cool stuff. I can almost assure it.
First try, “I love...
“If you give a man a cow, he’ll eat for about a week. If you teach a man to...”
– Evan
“We all have ways of coping - I use sex and awesomeness.”
– Jack Donaghy, 30 Rock (via kindacarsick)
good sir, you have the right idea
(via maturegentleman)
“What do you want to do for a living?”
“Well, I’d like to be a musician.”
“OH, can you show me a trick!?”
Logically
Before eating the forbidden fruit, Adam and Eve either knew that disobeying God was evil or they didn’t.
If they didn’t, then they can’t be blamed for disobeying him.
If they did, then they already possessed the knowledge that God had forbidden.
Either way, God could not justly banish them from Eden.
(Adduced by Richard R. La Croix.)
July 2009
14 posts
What I’ve recently been working on. No where...
“Watch out for his wink; You’ll lose your virginity.”
– Chase Byrd, speaking of Evan’s “Bearded Wink”
I just found out
that in the Hiroshima museum there is an infirmary room so that when Americans pass out or become sick, they have medical staff on hand for immediate care. Logically working backwards this means that the museums is filled with the most gruesome, visual portrayals possible of the atrocities that occured. This strikes me as a victory for irony. We might have bombed the fuck out of them, but they at...
1 tag
What?
If a train remains at the station from two to two to two-two (from 1:58 to 2:02), a passenger who misses it must wait from two-two to two to two.
Tom, while playing a game of Scrabble against Dick, who, while considering the last word that Harry (who had had HAD) had had had had, had had HAD, had had HAD. Had HAD had more letters, he would have played it.
Wouldn’t the sentence “I...
“Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus or a really cool opotamus?”
– Mitch Hedberg
1 tag
News Caster: Citizens of America, nuclear holocaust has become, as of a few hours ago, a distinct and looming threat to our nation
IRS Agent Rookie: Wow, wouldn't it be just horrible if America was leveled almost completely in a huge nuclear blast, killing hundreds of thousands even millions and reducing us to a nearly primitive state.
IRS Management: You better get out your handbook, Johnson, because you obviously haven't learned all the procedure yet. I'm not worried about nuclear holocaust, and you shouldn't either. We'd still have jobs! Check page 397. Detailed is the post-majority-death contingency plan so that all the taxes still get collected if America goes totally belly up otherwise. Aren't you excited? I always wanted to test out that plan!
Rookie: Are you fucking kidding me?
Evan: Sad/funny part? This is absolutely true. If America was leveled tomorrow, the IRS would be there, and they'd be ready to take all your money, like a herd of gorillas released in a banana factory.
1 tag
“Never. Ever. Under any circumstances, take a laxative and a sleeping pill on the...”
– Evan Wilson
1 tag
Playlist Creation or Evolution?
So, I was making an playlist on iTunes today. I created the playlist and proceeded to drag some music into it. When I thought I was finished, I checked the list so that I could burn it to a cd and found that there had been a bunch of music in it before I started. “I just made you!” I said, “Why do you have a bunch of stuff in you already?” Britt piped up, “That must...
1 tag
PETA
is stupid, and not to be taken seriously. “Why?” You might ask, “should I disrespect such an upstanding organization?” And I would reply, “because they are petty and laughable.” And here’s why: There is a famous historical fish market in Seattle. One of the major attractions to this fish market to the locals and the tourists(the only thing that might get a...
1 tag
Bears, a post from the old blog
Sometimes one word is enough to cover a subject. This is not one of those times. Bears are amazing and far more versatile than I realized as a subject matter. The first thing I learned about bears is how funny it is to try and fit the word bear into a movie’s title or character’s name. For example: Bear Wars (Obear-wan Kenobi, Bear2Dee2) Forrest Bear (If that’s not amazing...
Not only that,
I just moved here from blogspot because tumblr is quite a bit more dope. And I like that.
I wonder
whether cats resent being constantly responsible for controlling the rat population. First, I think that if cats are down with being domesticated, then they would be of the opinion that their time of being “wild” or a “predator” is over. Not only that, if you have a cat and you see a rat that is not dead anywhere near your house, what you think is “that cat is...
“A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a...”
– Robert A. Heinlein